We learn from our mistakes

The Silence of Emotions and the Risks for Relationships in the Company

Progressive emotional detachment undermines collaboration and a sense of belonging, turning work into mere execution of tasks without human connection

by Alberto Varriale*

3' min read

Translated by AI
Versione italiana

3' min read

Translated by AI
Versione italiana

A few months ago I held a series of meetings on the topic of empathy in business. Nothing particularly new, at least on the surface. Yet, what struck me was the way people listened. As if that topic touched on something long held back. As if talking about emotions at work was a need that had been left unspoken.

This led me to observe a phenomenon that is less obvious than others, but no less insidious: a widespread form of emotional indifference that runs through many organisations today.

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It is neither declared apathy nor explicit disengagement. It is something more subtle. A progressive anaesthesia. We react less, we expose ourselves less, as if paying attention to what we feel - and what others feel - has become superfluous, or even risky. Emotions are not denied, they simply stop being considered relevant: a background noise to be ignored. And so, without realising it, we become invisible to each other.

This indifference does not arise by chance. It is the result of several factors that intertwine and reinforce each other.

The first is the constant pressure. In increasingly competitive environments, workloads grow, expectations rise, mistakes become intolerable. For many, the only way to resist is to switch something off. Not because it is no longer felt, but because it costs too much to feel. Emotional detachment then becomes a survival strategy: a defence that protects in the short term, but over time deeply impoverishes.

Added to this is the digitalisation of relationships. E-mails, chats and virtual meetings have made work faster, but often devoid of human depth. Body language, micro-expressions, hesitations, shared silences are lost. Communication remains, but the relationship thins out. An emotional distance is created that makes it easier not to get involved.

This scenario also includes the fascination exercised by Artificial Intelligence, a powerful tool, but one that risks further shifting the focus from human dynamics to algorithmic ones. The more we get used to interacting with systems that do not feel emotions, the more we risk treating as optional what, in humans, is structural.

No less decisive is the organisational culture. In many companies, efficiency and rationality have become absolute values. Emotion is only tolerated if it does not disturb, if it does not slow down, if it does not complicate. Expressions such as 'don't take it personally' end up translating into an implicit invitation to switch off. Relationships are reduced to functional, correct but sterile exchanges.

Finally, there is the timour of exposing oneself. Showing anger, frustration or enthusiasm can be perceived as a risk: to appear weak, unprofessional, unfit. So one wears a neutral mask, a faceless professionalism that protects but isolates. Authenticity is sacrificed in the name of security.

The consequences of this indifference are profound.

The first concerns collaboration. When the needs and difficulties of others are no longer perceived, teamwork is reduced to a coordination of tasks. The team exists on paper, but lacks the cohesion that comes from mutual recognition.

Decisions are also affected. Ignoring the emotional dimension means making choices that are formally correct, but often short-sighted. Without emotional intelligence, one loses the ability to read context and understand the real impact of decisions on people.

On an individual level, the price is solitude. Those who close themselves off emotionally end up working alongside others, but not with others. Satisfaction wanes, the sense of belonging dissolves. Phenomena such as quiet quitting, on the other hand, do not arise from disinterest, but from a progressive emptying of meaning.

Work without human connection thus becomes a sequence of activities to be completed. It lacks the emotional resonance that transforms doing into experience, role into identity, commitment into meaning.

Countering this tendency does not mean turning work into a therapeutic space. Rather, it means recognising that emotions are not an obstacle to professionalism, but an inevitable component of it, a dimension that exists anyway, even when we pretend to ignore it.

Hence the need to rebuild spaces of authentic connection. Not big interventions, not extraordinary initiatives, but small, everyday attention. A sincere greeting, a conversation that is not just functional. Minimal gestures that make a difference over time.

Emotional indifference is a silent drift. Recognising it is the first act of responsibility. Because without recognised emotion there is no involvement, without involvement there is no meaning. And without meaning, work becomes only physical presence.

*Partner of Newton Spa

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